Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize