there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
