I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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