9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize