He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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