My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
