I want to walk on stilts...naked
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
you never un-have a 4some
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
