Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
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