My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
