it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Randomize
