I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
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