nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
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