franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
