I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
don't judge my taste in strippers
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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