He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
