So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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