I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
