Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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