just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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