You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Shame - the story of my life.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
