dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
how do flat chested girls get laid?
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Randomize
