i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
