dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
