I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
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Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
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I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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