You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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