He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
