Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
