So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
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The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
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hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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