I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
