Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
