I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Randomize