Moan for me like Helen Keller
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
