she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
