Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
