did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize