Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
