so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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