wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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