So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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