I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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