You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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