Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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