roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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