i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
