We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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