Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
