The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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