Texts From Last Night

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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.

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  (615): Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka. http://tfl.nu/pwqr
  Replies (15) Good night (905) Bad night (7928) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis

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  (315): Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis http://tfl.nu/8w9k
  Replies (82) Good night (11056) Bad night (1456) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?

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  (513): I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means? http://tfl.nu/ni5g
  Replies (12) Good night (3976) Bad night (847) Order T-Shirt
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.

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  (306): I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car. http://tfl.nu/2mw2
  Replies (15) Good night (5602) Bad night (995) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  "lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"

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  (303): "lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning" http://tfl.nu/szov
  Replies (16) Good night (7229) Bad night (804) Order T-Shirt
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.

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  (484): you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out. http://tfl.nu/twgf
  Replies (3) Good night (1837) Bad night (602) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.

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  (607): Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country. http://tfl.nu/h8yr
  Replies (10) Good night (2066) Bad night (514) Order T-Shirt
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  (323): View more from California

  You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.

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  (323): You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion. http://tfl.nu/elx2
  Replies (2) Good night (1269) Bad night (552) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.

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  (401): Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world. http://tfl.nu/8eb4
  Replies (8) Good night (2672) Bad night (432)
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  (949): View more from California

  i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.

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  (949): i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed. http://tfl.nu/mfiw
  Replies (7) Good night (745) Bad night (719) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man

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  (914): How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man http://tfl.nu/szzb
  Replies (2) Good night (1113) Bad night (310) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing

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  (856): I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing http://tfl.nu/iy02
  Replies (10) Good night (1082) Bad night (857)
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  (585): View more from New York

  A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment

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  (585): A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment http://tfl.nu/nqpl
  Replies (1) Good night (822) Bad night (173) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.

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  (615): Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will. http://tfl.nu/qydy
  Replies (11) Good night (651) Bad night (212) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.

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  (610): spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN. http://tfl.nu/4bnj
  Replies (12) Good night (909) Bad night (235) Order T-Shirt

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