i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Randomize
