shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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