I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
